Just like starting over

I had an appointment this morning that required dressing like a grown-up, professional-type adult instead of the yoga pants and/or sundress wearing hippie look I’ve been happily rocking all summer long.

As I pulled out a pair of great slacks that I bought at the Loft before we moved to Columbus, I was feeling pretty confident.

When those pants didn’t come ANYWHERE CLOSE to zipping, I realized that yoga pants and sundresses hide indulgences in fried pies and martinis and disguise all the time I didn’t spend at the gym while rehabbing my injured leg.

OK, I said to myself, don’t panic. I searched the closet for a black skirt that I almost donated to Goodwill because it was so loose in the spring. Awfully glad I didn’t donate it because it fit like a glove.

OK, I said to myself, crisis averted. I dressed up like a grown-up — albeit one that is a size larger than she was in March — and handled my business like a boss.

Then I went to Kroger and made good choices — fish, veggies, fruit — and spent the afternoon preparing healthy snacks and meals because THIS CANNOT STAND. I invested way too much time, blood and sweat to get fit and I will not go back. I just can’t — I won’t — do that to myself.

It’s time to step away from the wine glass and the cheese board and head back to the gym.

I actually started working out at the gym last week after my wound doctor said it was OK, but I didn’t follow up with healthier food choices and restraint on liquid calories.

Here’s the thing about having a tiny tummy — you can eat anything in small quantities. That’s great, unless you eat and drink high-calorie food and beverages in small quantities ALL DAY LONG.

I’ve said it many times before: Bariatric surgery is a tool, not a cure, for obesity. While I firmly believe people should love themselves at any size, I know I have to control my weight to maintain my health. I have a left knee I’d like to keep and I find normal blood pressure to be a pleasant feeling.

So catching myself sliding up the scale a single size is a good thing. And having my fall wardrobe as a motivator gives me the incentive to make the right choices for the rest of the summer because I really like those clothes and boots.

It’s not starting from point zero like I did in 2013, but it is starting over on a healthy track. I want to feel strong and confident again. I want to go back to being a gym rat. I want to make sure I stay within my calorie goal each day.

I want to wear yoga pants to exercise, not because they are my only wardrobe choice.

And I want those damn pants to zip.

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4 Responses to “Just like starting over”

  1. kathy says:

    You go girl!! You’ve got this…hell you just motivated me …and that is saying something!

  2. Margo says:

    You are an inspiration. I need to make better choices, too. I say after indulging in Caprese salad and s’mores for a late and extended lunch. *sigh*

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