Today is the first day of my vacation. And vacations never suck.
Besides the obvious time away from work, what I enjoy most about vacations is the possibilities. Days when you can do anything or nothing are just magical and so hard to come by that when you have them, you should savor them.
I’d also like to take some time during this vacation to really think about what I want to do with my life. For this, I will need a boat and a large body of water. Because I do my very best thinking on such vessels with the calmness and serenity of nature around me.
Luckily, my in-laws live on a lake in Indiana and they happen to have a boat. Stage set.
What I really need to contemplate is what do I really want to accomplish as a writer, how do I want to proceed with my career, and what, if anything, do I want to do about my weight loss plan.
These are heavy issues (pun completely intended, insert eye roll here) and I need some quiet time to weigh out (yeah, there’s another one) all my options.
I feel that my daily job gets in the way of so many of the things that I really want to do, but it also enables me to polish my skills as a journalist, interact in my community and be a part of a team that gives me pride.
I have always worked, so having a job is part of my identity and I wonder that if I quit to pursue other things, like grad school or building a career as a freelancer or an author, if I would lose a huge sense of self.
Working nine to five on weekdays should not be impeding my weight loss, but it feels like it does. Still, if I took that excuse out of the mix, what would I have left?
I love to take photos, but I am amateur at best. I might want to take a class this fall to improve my skills, but can I live up to that commitment on top of everything else?
And what about my “online identity”?
I want to build my blog as a form of self expression and to reach out to other people struggling with the same issues of loving-food-dreading-exercise-trying-to-stay-alive as I am. I know I need to make those much-ballyhooed life changes or I will end up disabled and dead from morbid obesity. I need a community and a way to talk to them.
I know they are out there. How do I reach them when I only post once in a while and often it’s about nothing evenly remotely related to the topic?
Maybe my trip to BlogHer10 will inspire me. Or maybe I will feel like the fat kid that nobody knows or wants to know.
This is most certain: I need the next ten days to think.
I need the next ten days to look very seriously at what I want and how to get it.
And we need to stock the cooler because I am going to be on that boat for a long time.
I’m absolutely zero help on the work/life-goals front, but would joining an honest-to-god *community* help? When I first started (not that I’ve gotten all THAT far), I came across tons (pun not intended – hee! I can do it, too!) of different weight loss/challenge-type blogging communities. I went with the Healthy You Challenge (http://www.scalejunkie.com/p/healthy-you-challenge.html) just because I liked that it didn’t focus solely on weight loss, as my goal is to improve my overall health. Checking in once a week & visiting the blogs of those who participate DOES help keep me on track somewhat. Just a thought! <3
Girl, I will take you up on the community help. I’ve been swimming a lot this week and I know I am becoming a food snob because real, natural food is the only thing I find appealing now. We can do this together.
What a wonderful post, Nona. I, too, struggle with the whole “what do I really want to do with my life” – sometimes being a grown-up just plain stinks! I hope you find all or at least some of the answers you are looking for on this trip. I can tell you this, I will be your biggest cheerleader in you weight loss journey. It’s tough and hard work, but you are worth it!!
Can’t wait to meet!
As far as Blogher….I totally WANT to get to know you better!
Yeah, so far I am no closer to any decision. Other than maybe I don’t really need to make one.