So I started the day by getting molested. Not really. I was medically molested. I met a strange woman in a parking lot and let her feel up, squeeze and photograph my boobs. Mobile mammogram. Get your mind out of the gutter. Nah, send it back the gutter. It’s much more fun there and that [...]
Archive for October, 2009
I did a first-grader’s homework today
October 13th, 2009
1 Comment
My hubby’s best friend from college has this totally adorable daughter named Faye. Her class has a Flat Stanley project. Hubby’s buddy decided to send the paper doll, Flat Faye, to us. Never heard of Flat Stanley? No biggie. The Reader’s Digest version of it is that the tot and all of her classmates made [...]
Boutique? Think more outdoor sporting goods
October 11th, 2009
No Comments
The back-on-plan weight loss thingy? Not going swell, I gotta admit. On Monday I bought a box of those 100-calorie pack cookies for my office. If I eat all six packs one at a time, that’s still 100 calories, right? We went to our favorite restaurant on Friday and I drowned my shitty-work-week sorrows in [...]
Welcome to my employment hell
October 9th, 2009
No Comments
Hello! Thanks for calling/dropping in/e-mailing! I am currently failing to meet the expectations of others, but your endless, insatiable need IS important to me. Rantings about my utter incompetence will burrow into my self esteem and be tattooed onto my psyche in the order they are received. Please leave a message detailing exactly how much [...]
Bad day, good husband
October 6th, 2009
No Comments
Had just about the worst day at work ever. And you have no idea how many horrible days I have had in 25 years of working. Today was SHITTY with a capital SHIT. I was so busy I just barely had enough time to eat my Healthy Choice cheese pizza, certainly no time to photograph [...]
Shots with the sheriff
October 5th, 2009
No Comments
Since I am sick, I need my vitamin C. And to me, vitamin C is sooooo much better with Malibu coconut rum. Just a dash- too much and it tastes like suntan lotion. And what goes better with such a tropical beverage than a little Marley, mon? OK, I really didn’t rum up my afternoon [...]
Sick day..again
October 5th, 2009
No Comments
I am sick of being sick. True, I like days off from work and snuggling with my pooches, but only when it’s my choice, not a necessity. This sickly crud came back yesterday. I stayed in bed most of the day except my hubs and I did go to a jazz ensemble concert because….ah hell, [...]
The little black dress strategy
October 3rd, 2009
No Comments
I am a goal-oriented kind of person. And I work best on a deadline. Oh sure, I bitch and piss and moan and stress to the point of screaming hissy fits when I am on deadline. But without one, I meander around aimlessly and never get much of anything done. Sort of like I did [...]
Good news, bad news
October 2nd, 2009
1 Comment
The good news? I somehow, magically, lost five pounds since I started this blog. This proves that blogging *should be* part of a healthy lifestyle. I will be applying for a grant to do further research into this theory. The bad news? Came to work, had to bust my sizable ass to meet a deadline, [...]
Light and boring and a little TMI
October 2nd, 2009
3 Comments
Pretty dull food day. Did not get my fat ass to the gym. So much for kicking off buff-tober. Just had my daughter completely insult me with the most outrageous and unnecessary lie via text messages. Not outrageous like, OMG, that’s so funny, you are outrageous! Outrageous like she totally has me confused with someone [...]
