Downscaling.net

Excited because we are flying about as far away from our little city to the Pacific Northwest, a place I have always wanted to go. Dread because I always feel like I am going to forget something before I leave the office or the house which will cause certain disaster to us and everyone we know and the whole vacation will be ruined and…I am exhausted before I even leave.

I was so busy at work today trying to get stuff done before I left that I didn’t have my first bite of food until 2 p.m. and then I paid $13 for sandwich, and apple, a yogurt and a bottle of water.

Not that there’s anything wrong with it, but, uh, $13? When she told me the total I said, “Excuse me,” and she said “$13.” And I said “Do what?” and she looked at me like I should be able to understand her rather clear speech, and I was like, “Uh, let’s put back the bottle water and I’ll take the tap, thanks.” But then she was going to have to get the manager so I said never mind just let me keep my $2 bottle of water I am sure it will taste like fine wine and so I took my sad little sandwich and my yogurt to a table and ate it. So there.

And then I went back to work where I had to correspond with a woman who feeds her dogs road kill – no shit, road kill – and I had to pretend like that’s a perfectly logical thing to do. She even butchers the dead, decaying critter carcasses before she feeds them to her dogs and ferrets.

Yep, you really need to make sure to scrape the Goodyear tread off the beaver before you feed it to your weasels.

You crazy biznatch.

Thanks for taking my mind off all the stuff I have to do before I leave for vacation.

At least I got my toes done. Oh yeah. Bye-bye ghetto toes and hello pretty pedicure. And the massage chair? Well let’s just call that a big old bonus. I was trying to figure out if it would fit in the trunk of my Beetle.