I know losing weight is actually a very simple formula: burn more calories than you consume. Simple. Forget the carbs, the fat, the fiber, whatever. If the movement of your ass is greater than the sum total of grub you stuff in your mouth, you will lose weight. I know this. For crying out freakin’ [...]
Archive for September, 2009
What. Was. I. Thinking?
September 28th, 2009
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Could I have picked a worse day to go back on the plan? The answer is no, I could not have. I am tired, I am stressed and I am hungry. Clearly, I need to develop better coping skills. But right now I would cut a bitch for a bag of M&Ms. A co-worker brought [...]
Back on plan
September 28th, 2009
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Tomorrow. I am officially going to back on the Weight Watchers plan tomorrow. I am making a vow to myself to not whine. Too much. I will be hungry. I will feel deprived. Meals will suck, at least a little. I will feel sorry for myself. Can’t help it. Might as well own up to [...]
Vacation wrap-up: asshats, kids and luggage
September 27th, 2009
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While we were de-boarding the plane in Atlanta, the asshat in 39D, the one that had his head in my lap for the entire flight? Hit me in the face with his backpack. And some old guy grabbed my left boob. And a small child explained how to make chocolate milk. I loved that little [...]
Falling water and naked wine
September 26th, 2009
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Yesterday we visited Multnomah Falls in the Columbia River Gorge. After we hiked and took lots of photos and appreciated the sheer beauty of nature, we headed to Hood River and sampled lots of beer at Full Sail Brewery and went to the world’s most memorably-themed tasting room at the Naked Winery. And we spent [...]
Jerks on a plane
September 26th, 2009
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So we had to get up at ass-thirty in the morning to get to the airport so we could catch our predawn flight back to reality. And I managed to only be a smart-assed biznatch to my husband about half a dozen times before we finally got through security and found a Starbucks for the [...]
September 25th, 2009
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Last breakfast in Oregon. Chocolate hazelnut scone and yum-ilcious coffee. And the company of my sexy-licious hubby. Bliss. Today we go to visit a waterfall. Photos later.
The last meal
September 24th, 2009
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We went out for dinner last night to celebrate my gorgeous hubby’s birthday. On the recommendation of the hotel’s concierge, we had reservations at Newman’s, a French-Italian bistro in a tiny yellow cottage on Hemlock, the main drag of Cannon Beach. In my mind this was the last indulgent meal I planned to have before [...]
Happy birthday to my hubby!
September 24th, 2009
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Today is my husband’s 45th birthday. I reminded him that means he is no longer in his early 40s. He said thank-you-very-much-for-reminding-me-beeotch. And I said you-are-welcome-very-much-old-man-don’t-make-me-beat-you-run-your-ass-over-with-my-Hoveround. Then we hobbled around the beach all day swearing at each other as practice for when we are really old. OK, not really. Happy birthday, honey. I love you [...]
